Been spending pratically the whole entire week of Raya holidays with myself, thinking, exclaiming sorrows, all sorts of confusion. What I did most was praying, painting, skating, reading and stoning in my room, you know a little me time. Kay that's such a colossal waste of time since there's still one more week of trials to get over with, but I can't concentrate. You know I normally don't post emo thoughts up here right ? Not that I'm afraid of what people might think or wanting people to know that I'm agonizing, mourning or in despair.

As perceived I don't feel comfortable at all sharing my problems nor speaking them out. I've always been a reticent and much prefer to keep them all to my self. What's the point right ? Someone once told me before, what I'm doing is not healthy at all, might as well blurt and cry it all out. Then some said I often have solemn expression, what do you want me to do ? Smile seem to be the least that can be done. I'll try alright ?

I always have premotion toward certain situations. Don't ask me why, I find it really confusing like what on earth is God trying to say to me ? Am certianly not worry about it, usually just play by ear. By the way, why am I typing this ? What the heck am I even thinking now ?

I'm not as nice as you think, whatever I don't know. Taking advantages from one person and another. Ya normal you may say plus anyone can, but come to think of it, my gosh terrible, bad idea !! & I.. I don't think I can continue typing and going with this. Don't feel compel to do so either...